Tuesday, November 20, 2012 at 10:19PM
Jane came about 7pm. Though I had composed myself from earlier incident in which I cried and wished I hadn’t given up my stock of medication which gave me a type of security blanket, I immediately felt myself beginning to crumble. I could feel my emotions coming and tried to hold back the tears but I began to cry as Jane tried to understand what was happening. The 3 hours were spent talking about my desire to end my life my feelings of inadequacy my inability to survive on the resources I have. My emotional distress surrounding my belief that I am not as deserving or loved as others. Jane comforted me trying to reassure me of her commitment, care, and willingness to support me. I told her how she gave up long ago on me. I feel though her words and the actions of her showing up here says she has not given up, she changed what she was doing which was working, helping, and instead lost interest in all that when she realized I was junk!
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